FRIENDSTERS & FRIENDSTRESSIXES,
Join me in a chorus of halluluiah for the bounty of srtwork you are about to receive!! I’m so excited to present to you new ART called:
1. NO GRAYS IN SIGHT
2. NO BEIGES IN SIGHT
3. RUFUS & INGRID REACH A PEACE AGREEMENT RE: THEIR SINCERE APPRECIAYION FOR EACH OTHERS CULTURE
It has been about a month & a half since I checked in with you all, my spies, my lookers!! I loved you & missed youthe whole time though, trust me. Believe me.
I have SO much to catch you upon. SO MUCH in fact, that I probably will NOT cover it all today. IN FACT, i may just leave you with an outline of what to expect to read about in futurre blofs.
1. TRANS/DETRANS UPDATES
a. seeing fewer FtMtF detransitioners telling their stories online
b. seeing more content from MtFtM detransitioners, but not a whole lot
c. seeing lots more comedic content from trans/gay folks. Netflix better be handing out comedy money to the queers that’s all I be saying.
d. this is all going in the direction I had hoped it would. I have found my foothold in the belief that while trans & nonbinary may be “trending’ for a few more minutes, and that not everyone who experiences gender “discomfort” needs to medically transition, there will not be a return to the days where gender is just assigned & accepted without question.
2. AKATHISIA UPDATES
a. along with trans/detrans shit, I also continue to do research on akathisia
b. I have found out lots of interesting, shocking stuff
c. I will share it with you soon
d. but here is a little tidbit: I know Robin Williams died form akathisia not Lewy Body Dementia
e. also…I have had akathisia 2 times. Recently in 2021, but also in 2014. I will explain the hows & whys in a futturre blog
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| NO GRAYS IN SIGHT (Aug 2022) |
3. MY OWN PHARNACEUTICAL UPDATES
a. because I’m a person who values my big fat electric brain, I’ve always been against pills/pharmaceuticals/antidepressants/etc…
b. but due to circumstances that sometimes happen, I found myself having to take such drugs a few years ago
c. now it is time to reevaluate what my big fat brain does & doesn’t need from big pharma
d. as you can probably tell by all the exclamation points & misspellings, I did a quick taper off the Seroquel in June. It went well. No real side effects, except INSOMNIA.
e. SEROQUEL is a magical drug. But like all magical drugs it is VERY dangerous if you take it for too long. I was advised by the doctor who put me on it to taper off as soon as I felt I could.
f. I REALLY enjoyed the sleep that SEROQUEL allowed me to have. As a lifelong insomniac, that was a real TREAT. and the dreams!! The gorgeous Seroquel dreams… so vivid & complex… ALAS!!!
g. it’s back to being awake at all hours.
h. in August I have been doing a much slower taper off duloxetine (Cymbalta). Cymbalta is an SSRI, so it is not magical, just effective. Whatever part it played in regulating my dopamine levels back in 2021, I am grateful for. But I really, really hate SSRIs as a personal rule.
i. no one ever told me to taper off the Cymbalta but I am going to anyway, so I can see if I really need anymore.
j. so far, I have experienced a terrible 2-day migraine, nausea, & an edgy temperament bordering on rage occasionally
k. I experinced ZERO rage in the year & half I was on SEROQUEL & Cymbalta. It was nice. I’m using CBD oil to manage the edgeness. It works pretty well.
l. I am really hoping the edgy temperament is due to the taper, not a sign of how things are gonna be. Because really… I have no real thing to be rageful about…anymore…
m. OR DO I?
4. POETRY UPDATE
a. my poetry carrer is going well. i am so close to being famous I can almost tongue-sense it.
b. I sent out a bunch of subs late last year, and early this year and got lots of REJECTIONS and several acceptances too
c. But I’m about to embark on 2 YUGE poetry endeavors
d. First I start working on a chapbbok or even manuscript length chronicle of what happened during & after my last psychic safari (SHAMANISTIC FIGHT CLUB)
e. YOU ALL read the streams of consciousness that accompanied SHAMANISTIC FIGHT CLUB. I know you did.
f. and you think I’m a spiritual narcissist for daring to have such an adventure while you didn’t/weren’t able to
g. it’s okay…I can see you all & know that you are spiritual narcissists too. We all are kind of. It’s just natural to think you have spoken to god & that he wants you to tell everyone else what he said, I mean we all do it, right??? RIGHT?
h. Actullya that’s not what happened to me.. Haaha. Ha. Ha. So stop being jealous. Just try having your own spiritual adventure when you can.
i. On top of all that…on top of writing about a spirituall narcissism that possesses us all , I will be weaving the tale of my chronic cyberstalker…
j. YES I HAD ONE FOR MANY YEARS(& probably still do, I just haven’t checked in awhile)
h. But I have never spoken of it aloud, or in print, because…even though I can be a very enraged weirdo, I’m also kind of a wuss when it comes to dealing with … err…ummm…. direct, head-on confrontation w/ someone who is harassing me for reasons unknown…
i. anyway… the cyberstalking took a dark, invasive turn in the summer of ’20 and we were forced to reckon with it
j. we had to decide what action we could/would/should take
k. it nearly tore us apart
l. the stress of it all caused me to seek help in the form of a new medication called Abilify. This is the drug that gave me akathisia for 3 months.
m. pardon me while I connect these dots … … …
n. yway… I hope I can convey what an absolutely horrific confluence of events led us to our happy hobbity home in beautiful jasper Indiana.
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| NO BEIGE IN SIGHT (Aug 2022) |
o. The other YUGE poetry endeavor I’m about to embark on is a thorough inquest into the works of BUKOWSKI. I have read some of his work. enjoyed it well enough. But I need to know why he is the most revered & emulated poet amongst well… … … white dudes.
p. Expect my full, unredacted findings here in The Octopus’s Diarrhea Garden
*. MY VERY OWN GENDER TRANSITION
a. I have 2 words for my 7th year on testosterone: ARM ACNE
b. don’t woryy I’m not gunna detranstion over it, jeez…
c. Autoandrophilia is the fire!
d. Can y’all believe I been on T for 7 years???!!! I can.
6. QUINTETLETS
a. the quintuplets names are ELOISE, ANAWEN, INGRID, IMOGENE, and ISABEL
b. their buns are PORTUGAL, ATTICUS, RUFUS, FLORA , and DORA
c. respectively
7. ART UPDATES
a. I love doing art, but god...it has been a lifelong learning adventure!!!!!!
b. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
c. the first 2 artworks were based on sketches I found in my akathias ia notebook. It is akathisia art.
d. [I also found some writing I did from that time period, which I had dismissed as garbage-ranting, but actually captures the experience pretty well. I’l share it with yall in a futurre blog]
e. ennyway… I’m taking a few months oof art to woork on pooetry
f. I hope you can handle that.
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| RUFUS & INGRID REACH A PEACE AGREEMENT RE: THEIR SINCERE APPRECIATION FOR EACH OTHERSES CULTURE |
8. LET’S SEE…WHAT ELSE CAN I TELL YOU??
a. I guess that about covers it for now!!
b. Stay well & I’ll see you next ime… in The Octopud Litterboxery
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